Past

Lines of Listening

kbsitepicsession0151

McShane was spinning lines and the groove was right on.  Heads moving marked the beat, wonder boy’s amp was cranked and everything was right with the world.  When you’re laying down a thing, and people are digging it, that’s a place.  You invite people in.  If they come, you dig it.  If they don’t come, you dig it anyway.  Honour what you put together.  That’s the dance.

I’m just a rhythm player.  It’s my job to hear where the ideas are going and sketch out a place where they can grow.  Push too hard and no one can play to it.  Lay back too far and no one wants to.  Too many of your own ideas and there’s no room for melody and meaning.  Not enough inspiration and lead lines fill the space with nothing but ego and spin.

It was a good night.  We had a community of players who’d show up to put it together, a shifting cast of characters regular enough to get a take on one another, shaking it up enough to keep it fresh.  Tonight Waits was behind the bass, Killer was doing drums, I was holding down the rhythm, and McShane was standing in front of his amp cooking the tubes to make solos enough for the whole house.  And the house was eating it up.  In between the solos we were spinning the most delicious grooves.  Nothing we’d worked out, we were just head down and listening, locked like you can only get when the band trusts one another.  Good groove is about trust.

We’d been playing for an hour and change, I wasn’t loose enough yet to go the whole night, so I made the nod.  The guys picked up on it and we called a break.  McShane notified the folks, “We’re gonna walk for a while.  Tony’s here somewhere.  When we come back we’ll see if we can get her up to sing a couple.”  Tony could sing the phone book and break your heart.  The crowd roared approval.  “Hey Jo, turn on the bubble machine.”  A smile and a nod, recorded tunes took over and people made the change from input to output.  Within seconds the talk-talk was on bigtime.  I hit the side door for the alley and air.

“Hard times.” Sparechange held out a smoke.  I took it and lit, “No more than usual, you know how it is.”  I nodded around the other folks hanging out.  “You?”

“I tell you, it’s hard times, man.”  Sparechange nodded to himself, “Hard times is in the air.”  A drag, a beat, “This is hard times, man, nobody gets nothin’.”  He looked at me straight, “Ain’t nothin’ but trouble come from hard times.”

“Seen some good things done in hard times.”

“Ain’t none of it rainin’ down on me.”

“You gotta believe in something, may as well believe in bad times I suppose.”

“You got anything better?”

Another drag while I thought about it. “People, maybe.”

“That’s kinda conditional.”

Hadn’t thought about, but he was right.  “I guess people are kinda like that.  But in bad times there’s usually someone out there trying to do something good.  I could believe in what makes that happen.”

“Guilt?  That’s a hell of a thing to believe in.”

“Can’t run a band on guilt.”  I threw the butt in the can.  “But you can run a band on time.  I should go get loose and we’ll run the night.  You alright?”

“Yeah, man.  It’s what it is.”  He shrugged, “Go be with your people.”

I made my way back into the talk talk to tune up and see what we might lay down.  I suppose I can believe in a good groove.  And when it comes along I believe I’d rather play it in tune.  That’s two things I could say I believe in.  But I think Sparechange had it wrong.  I think with most folks trying to do something good in bad times there ain’t no guilt involved.  But whatever it is makes that happen, I could believe in that.  But what is that, “anti-guilt?”

“What’s that?” from Killer taking his seat behind the kit.

“Just mumbling out loud.  Almost like when I’m thinking, only without the smart bit.”

“If you sing when you play make it a vocal.”

“Not worth it really.  Was just wondering what you call that thing that makes people do good things in bad times.”

“Like when they blow the espresso machine over your solos?”

“Sparechange said it was guilt, but I don’t think so.  Was just wondering about the opposite of guilt.  And what is anti-guilt anyway?  Is that the same as innocence?”

“Oh man, you’re too weird.”

“This coming from a drummer.”

“Call.”

“The Unconvinced.”  Caring for one another as we did, professional discourtesy was a thing for a few of us.  Inventiveness was valued, rule was if you resorted to an old joke, hit a cliché or leaned on a metaphor too hard you’d get called.  Had to give it up unless you could come up with a new name for a band.  Kept things cheerful.  In reality most of us had one we’d already thought of so it didn’t slow things down much, just added to the ritual.  Me, I usually had two or three in my pocket.  I’m that kinda guy.  “And are there degrees of oppositeness?”

“That depends on what you believe.”

“And does believing in a thing make it so?  And howcome drummers never tune?”

“Depends on what you believe in.  We do it subtly so you won’t catch on.”

“Cut the smart talk, here’s the boss.”

“What smart talk?  You guys aren’t being bright on company time.”  McShane grabbed his guitar and plugged in.  “And don’t call me boss, I told you this is an autonomous collective.”

“You know they never nominate rhythm guitar players as rock gods.”  I dialled up a sound, cranked the tube a little warmer.

“Apparently they don’t have the parts,” from behind the kit.

“Watch it, you can be replaced by a bunch of loops.”

“You can’t program in the soul Brother Bee.”

“Maybe you can, but’s that’s not the game tonight.  Brother Waits has the bass.  You know how to play that thing or is it just decorative?”  Waits smiled and launched into a line, he is a never-ending source of delight.  Drums hit the beat and we circled around the figure a couple of times to set it down, sorting, feeling.  I played the texture game, teasing at notes, touching on rhythms.

Before we could settle McShane teased out the house with a scrap of melody that turned into a high long wail, a pause at the end of the line, there’s that moment where we all take a breath, I crunched the chord twice and we were off.  Settling in with solid groove, could be good, let’s keep it for a while.  This wasn’t the main event, but sure could take us there.  It’s obvious we’re going to be laying this down for a while, so folks start moving to it.  By the time I’m home enough that I can spare a moment I look up to check on McShane and see we’ve got most of the room lively up.  “Tell me how it is, brother.”  And he’s off.

Mcshane could light up a space on just two notes, he was like that.  I swear you could pick any two notes and he’d make them work, make them soar, make them sing.  Make something out of the space between them that you’d never thought of before, or maybe just something you always knew but it was good to hear it right here, right now.  And by the time he was done you’d realise that he’d said something, maybe something that you never thought of before, or maybe something you always knew but needed to hear it again, right here, right now.

But he wasn’t done yet, we were just getting started. around the bend and one long note says that we’re going to be here for a while so settle in and listen up, we tighten up the groove around the note then lay back and give the man the room he needs.  And apparently the room he needs is this room full of people right here.  He spins out a line and it feels like need, and the rhythm says gotta, just gotta, and the people feel that there’s a need.  Some start dancing, some just moving, don’t know what I need, they say, but I gotta move.  The guitar hits it again, I got a need, he says, and I gotta move.  You know it say the people, gotta, just gotta the rhythm affirms.  He slides into the line and shapes two notes that growl off of one another, need to resolve, but need to be together to make that noise right now, they wind and wrestle in the air and the dancers say gotta, just gotta, and the rhythm stands up and says yeah!  I just got to move.

It was going to be a good night.

“Tony! you out there?” wonder boy did the shout out, “We need you to take this thing somewhere.”

We were a bunch of tunes into it and showing some signs of this being a memorable night.  It’s all good, but some times are fine.  And Tony’s voice can turn a shindig into a grand affair in a heartbeat.  Let the games begin.

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A Little Bit of Trouble

kbsitepicscene008“I’ve got a hibiscus that’s in a little bit of trouble.  Well, a lot of trouble.  Maybe distress is a better word.  Actually, I seem to be in the process of committing murder.  What would they call that, herbicide?  Can you commit that?”

Things That Remain

It’s funny the things that stay in memory.  And the things that don’t.  I know I’ve written at least a double handful of songs that I just don’t know any more.  Sometimes I may even still have the words, but I simply can’t remember how it goes.  Not the slightest idea.  But it’s also odd what sticks around.  Sometimes it’s snatches of lines.  ‘Art is the future calling’.  I think I may have that around somewhere, don’t know the whole thing, just a few lines, you’d think I’d remember them.  Part of the problem with that one is I simply couldn’t believe I was actually writing about what I was.  I was trying to get at some thoughts about how art is an early radar for social change (one writer even goes so far as to maintain that aspects of popular music will describe in significant ways what society at large will be like a few years later), and I seemed to be linking that thought to how history can be used to try to suggest that things were better before this and that we should somehow return to that time.  Round about then I realized I was into some pretty strange territory and who did I think I was anyway.  So I quickly finished the thing and stuffed it into a pile.  Haven’t really looked at it since, but d’you think I can call any of it to mind?  Nope.  On the other hand with a single listening I learned that there once was a man of Devizes, whose ears were of two different sizes, the one was so small it was no use at all, the other so big it won prizes.  From which I conclude that memory has no taste.

Just Like a Man

I hadn’t written anything new for a while.  Sort of happens to me, especially when I get working on other things, or when life gets in the way.  Lord knows there’s been enough of that lately.  I’ll put off encouraging myself to write, but sometimes songs just push themelves into being.  This was one of a pair that came out of the blue.  I’ve played it a couple of times, and folks approved.  Okay, I guess I’ll keep it.  I’ve got a melody in mind, but it really is a straight-ahead blues thing, so as promised here are the words, make of it what you will.  Just remember not to point it at anybody, that’s not polite.  Written for so many friends of all persuasion.  Like all good songs, apparently it’s a true story.

She says I can’t do nothin’, and I don’t do nothin’ right
Maybe there’s nothin’ doin’, just the way it is tonight
Just like a man, yeah, yeah, yeah
There’s only one thing I know I understand
I like a woman, who likes a man

Some people think I’m crazy, some people they just laugh
Some people they don’t know what to think, ’cause I sure ain’t no better half
Just like a man, yeah, yeah, yeah
There’s only one thing I know I understand
I like a woman, who likes a man

Not because you buy her trinkets, or drive a fancy car
Not because of some attitude, just ’cause of what you are
She likes a man, yeah, yeah, yeah
There’s more than one thing you know she understands
… but she likes a man

So, she says I can’t do nothin’, leastways nothin’ right
Maybe there’s nothin’ doin’, it’s just the way it is tonight
Just like a man, yeah, yeah, yeah
There’s only one thing I know I understand
I like a woman, who likes a man

Been Wondering

I suppose I should’ve asked this before, but I’ve been wondering for a while.  So, we’ve got mother’s day and father’s day, how come we don’t have brother’s day?  Or did I just miss it?

Conversations

Quite a few in the series, but this was how it ended.  It only makes sense if you know about the shovel.  Still my favourite somehow.

One day, God and the monkey were playing hide and seek.

I’m not very good at this, said the monkey.  You always win.

You’ll get better at it, said God.

What do You mean? asked the monkey.

You’ll see.  My turn.  Start counting.

One, one, one…  said the monkey.

And God disappeared.

Conversations

I had forgotten that there were quite a few of these.  They came along fairly regularly for a while.  I won’t burden you with all of them, but this was a favourite for many people.

One day, God was sitting under the shade of a cool tree, when along came the monkey eating an orange.

Hello God, said the monkey, how are you today?

Fine, said God, who was always fine.  That looks good.

It’s an orange, said the monkey, looking like he was pretty sure that was the right answer.  I found it.

It’s a fruit, said God.

No, it’s an orange, said the monkey.  He took another big juicy bite. See?

It has a seed, said God.

I know, said the monkey, spitting one out looping high into the blue sky.  They fly.

God leaned back against the cool of the tree.  If you put one in the ground, He said, it will make another orange.

Really?

Yes, said God, who knew everything.

I would like another orange, said the monkey, taking one last big juicy bite and spitting out one last seed high into the air.

You could put it over there, said God, looking over at a particularly nice bit of sun.

I would like another orange here, said the monkey, poking his finger in the dirt.

What are you doing? asked God.

Looking for oranges, said the monkey, and he poked another finger in the dirt. and then again.

You’ll have to wait a while, and God leaned back further into the shade.

The monkey ran back along the path all the way to the top of the hill poking the ground as he went.  Maybe over here, said the monkey as he went over the hill and out of sight.

When it had been quiet for a while, God sat up in the shade and stretched.  Then He reached high into the tallest branches of the tree and pulled down a beautiful orange.  He admired it for a moment.  Then leaned forward and rolled the orange down the hill, where it came to rest on the path right where the monkey had been standing.

Then He leaned back in the cool of the shade, closed His eyes.

And God smiled.

Conversations

I don’t know whether I’ve shared this with you before, it seems like these conversations began a lifetime ago.  I suppose it was.  So this is what a lifetime looks like.

One day, God was walking along the river admiring the colours of the leaves in the trees. Hello monkey, He said, and then He looked up.

Hello God, said the monkey, who was sitting in one of the tallest trees, holding a shovel.

My, that’s a lovely shovel, said God.

Do You really think so?

Yes, I do. But what are you doing with it in that tree? asked God, who already knew the answer, but wanted to see what the monkey would say.

I was going to dig a hole, said the monkey.

In the tree?

No, said the monkey, nodding his head for good effect.

In the ground? supplied God.

Probably, said the monkey.

Any place in particular?

Not really, said the monkey, trying to look helpful. But I knew if I ever wanted to dig a hole, a shovel would be a good thing to have. And it is a lovely shovel. He held it out for God to see.

I can see that, said God, who could see anything, even standing there beside the river. Is it your shovel?

Yes? asked the monkey.

Probably not, said God, who was wondering whether the monkey was really ready for this. Tell me, He asked, How many monkeys are there?

One, replied the monkey, confident.

Wrong, said God, as gently as only He could.

I knew that, said the monkey, I just couldn’t count any higher.

Maybe you’d better put that shovel back where you found it, said God.

And the monkey did.

And God saw that it was good.

Conversation Interrupted–circles

It’s mostly good not to know when it’s the last conversation you might have with someone.  But sometimes there’s another awareness, that it’s the last time I’ll have that particular conversation with someone, even though I’ll most certainly be with them again, and we’ll have other conversations.  Sometimes it’s because rare surroundings trigger the subject.  Sometimes it’s just because we talk about many things and this is only one of them.  Sometimes it’s because we don’t get a chance to talk one on one.  And two people just goes different.

I remember one time we happened to be standing a little ways off from a few musicians who were themselves standing around and playing together.  A small, tight circle, they were focused completely on what they were laying down.  “You know, I wish this wouldn’t happen all the time.”  I said I agreed, that it tended to make anyone listening feel like they were eavesdropping.  We both knew that it was common and normal and okay, but that was nice when it took other forms.  We spoke of many things.  We spoke of enjoying hearing musicians just playing, not performing.  We spoke of enjoying watching the active exchange between musicians when they were improvising, especially with people they had only just met.  We spoke of how it is a very different experience between player and listener, and how there are common aspects to each.  We spoke of many things.

And somehow we packed it all into a very few words.

Y’know, you can miss people for the oddest reasons.

Worth Mentioning

I will have to find a permanent place to put the thought, and you’re right I probably should have said so already, but maybe now is a good time to clarify.  When reading what’s written here please remember.

What isn’t purely fiction is opinion and metaphor.

Good to know.